Do you own your own personal power? Do you feel you can say no when you need to? Do you feel like you’re Wonder Woman in a tricky business or work situation or do you feel the opposite? Are you comfortable sharing your message with the world?
This week on Your Freedom Unlimited we are talking about owning your personal power. This is such a powerful concept that can either bring goosebumps of excitement – or a cold shiver – if deep down we feel like we’re not really owning our power.
Why are we talking about it? Because I believe owning your power is such a vital part of personal happiness … when we own our power we’re more likely to get out there and do the things that matter most to us. Without it, we can stay paralysed in the corner with fear.
What Does It Mean To Own Your Personal Power?
Before I go on let me also be clear about what it looks like to own your personal power – as it is such a loaded phrase for so many of us. I’ve found some people have some pretty negative associations with this concept and so won’t go near the idea.
So someone who barks orders at their team, or who bignotes themselves in front of others, or judges others, is NOT someone who owns their personal power.
Owning your personal power is about having a sense of confidence and assuredness that comes from within, rather than forcing power on others through coercion, control, egotism or making others feel less than.
Why am I talking about this now?
A few weeks ago I had the honour of coaching a group of incredible women who had been working on their “why” statements inspired by the amazing Simon Sinek. Each woman’s story was amazing and their courage in creating change in their lives was powerful.
Moving from creating your why to finding your voice and confidently sharing your message with the world is, however, a big step … that can be very scary for some.
That night we talked a lot about confidence and courage. We spoke about owning your “why” and “owning your power”
We also talked a lot about how we can diminish ourselves and “not quite” step into our power.
An AHA moment came when I said – “If you don’t step truly in and own your power – then those who need your support, or your services, simply cannot see you.”
It can be sooooooo frustrating when you are in this space! When you know you have a message you want to get out into the world, or a service you want to offer, but you just can’t seem to get traction.
This is something I’ve been through first hand and I’ve seen so often with clients who’ve been struggling to find their purpose, power or voice.
The big takeaway here? If you’re struggling – you are certainly not on your own and there is a way to get through this. Don’t suffer in silence. There is a path through. That’s why I’m talking about this today.
In this episode, we’re focusing on what does it mean when we really do own our power and why is it important. Next episode I’ll share some tips on how to step in and own your personal power.
What Does It Look Like to Own Your Personal Power?
This idea of owning your personal power can be a very cerebral and intangible thing so the best way I can describe it is to share with you the characteristics of someone who owns their personal power.
So what does that person look like? They are is self-assured and solid within themselves, they are confident, happy, and able to share their views without bringing others down.
They are authentic, life-giving, and clear about their value to the world.
I’ve also observed that when you own your personal power you have a lot more agency within your own life. You feel you can go for your dreams and goals and you are able to do things beyond your own comfort zone. You’re not waiting for someone’s permission – you’re are going for it. You are a leader in your life!
To get a sense of this take a look around your life and look at the people who are doing different things. Look at who is moving forward in their lives and look at others who may be holding themselves back in some way.
If we look beneath the surface it’s often evident that the person who feels a sense of personal power is the one who is doing more of what they love.
Personal Power Comes From Within
The most fascinating and important thing about personal power is recognising it is something that comes from within. It is an energetic frequency that we hold within our biofield.
As you know in this podcast I talk a lot about frequency and vibration. In many previous episodes, I have talked about the fact we are energy and we can choose the emotional frequency we want to be at. You can go back and listen to episodes devotes to specific emotional frequencies like trust, gratitude, self-worth, acceptance, and allowing.
For me, personal power is a very clear energy frequency that can be felt the moment someone walks into the room.
Importantly this is where the person feels confident as well as looks confident. There is no bravado – the feeling goes right to the core of who that person is. People who energetically own their personal power are the ones we are drawn to at a dinner party, they’re the ones that we listen to on social media and they’re the ones we buy from. Their energy is so strong and so aligned that it draws people in.
The extremely good news is that personal power is something you can authentically and intentionally generate within yourself – I’ll talk more in the next episode about how to do that.
I’ve Experienced Both Sides of the Coin
So for me coming from a background of high functioning anxiety, I feel like I’ve lived on both sides of the coin. I feel like I lived with very little power personal power when I was experiencing severe anxiety. I had no voice and was treading water professionally.
Since I had my breakthrough on that I can see how my personal power has grown and my sense of confidence in myself is allowing me to do and experience things I would not have thought possible before – things like this podcast, running live events, studying new disciplines and talking about spirituality, meditation and frequency, and anxiety even with my corporate clients.
The big difference has been shifting from being a spectator of life to being a participant in my life. That to me is what personal power is all about – someone who is participating fully in life and who is enjoying it.
Why Is It Vital to Own Your Personal Power?
To me owning your personal power is vitally important. There are so many good reasons to own your personal power here are just a few:
1. You’ll Get More Of What is Important to You Done
If you don’t own your power you’re less likely to get more of what’s important to you done – because you’ll feel less confident and the chances are your fear will stop you. Take that from someone who knows. Fear is paralyzing and can stop you cold in your tracks.
So if there are things that you’ve been thinking about doing for a long time but putting off – perhaps think about why that might be?
Have you been thinking about starting a new business, changing careers, or moving to a new place? I thought about doing this podcast for 5 years before I started.
When we feel more confident within ourselves then we’re more likely to do those things that are going to move us out of our comfort zones.
2. Those Who Need to See You Will See You
This was the message I delivered that night to that lovely group of women – and I see this all the time with my clients. If they don’t energetically own their personal power that they don’t have the confidence to really put themselves out there into the world.
The shame about this is it those people who need to see you in your power in your essence and who need access to your services cannot see you if you are not sharing who you are with them.
The laws of marketing are much simpler than we think. This is where the mindset piece of marketing really comes in. People wonder why their marketing strategies are not working and I can see immediately it’s because they do not believe in themselves or their offering. They do not feel confident and strong, and this lack of energetic alignment has a huge impact on their ability to be seen and heard by those who really need their services.
3. You’ll Stop Diminishing Yourself and Will Feel Less Frustrated
If you catch yourself saying things like “I’m kind of a … mentor”, or “almost a leader” chances are you’d like to own your power but you have some sort of limiting belief that is not allowing you to truly own it. With that belief in place, it’s safer for you to diminish yourself rather than really stepping in and owning your power.
The problem with diminishing ourselves consistently – and let me tell you I’ve done that – is that we do not truly step into our power. This can make us frustrated that we’re still not achieving our goals – or serving those that we want to serve in the way that we would like to serve them.
The truth here – that can be hard to admit – is that what’s stopping us is actually ourselves. It is not others and their behaviours or circumstances beyond our control like a meeting that doesn’t go to plan – it is really our fears. By not fully stepping in, by using language that diminishes us we can stop ourselves from doing the work we truly want to do. I have studied mindset and NLP and what we think about ourselves and the language we use is absolutely fundamental to the quality of life that we live.
4. You’ll Feel More Aligned
When we’re in our personal power we will feel more aligned – what we think and believe on the inside is what we will live on the outside. This is a big one – this is the place where we are able to say no in a conversation if we’re feeling stretched for time when ordinarily we would say yes. This is the place where we will advocate for a position on a matter rather than staying quiet.
This happened to me recently where I was presenting a strategy to a group of people. One of the people listening voiced their disagreement with one of the central premises of the strategy. At that moment I could have acquiesced to the view. Instead, I restated my view and the reasons for it.
Because the strategy was well-grounded and verified and it was important people listening understood this before moving on to make a decision. Did I feel excited about having to go back over the point? No, but it needed to be done at that moment to maintain overall alignment.
5. You’ll Feel Happier
I firmly believe owning your personal power is actually one of the building blocks of personal happiness. Why? Because when you are in alignment, when you’re doing the things you love, when you feel like you’re making progress towards your goals and that you are learning and growing – you actually will feel happier.
The other key thing that I’ve learnt on this journey is that when you own personal power you move from feeling like a victim to a set of circumstances – to feeling like you are leading your own life. This is what personal power is all about. It is about you taking your life in the direction that you would like to take it in.
Over To You
As ever on Your Freedom Unlimited, I’d love to hand this over to you to consider and to think about how you could implement so these ideas in your own life. I’m always available to chat about these things please feel free to DM me on Instagram or email me at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Also, look out for my episode next week where I’ll share some practical steps you can take to building or personal power within yourself.
If you like this episode please share it with friends or anyone you feel might find value from it. Also please rate and review this episode wherever you listen to your podcast. Until we speak again until then lots of love and take great care.